We are able to just like dead ladies, towards the windows they checked nude and you may desolate, the most wonderful was one whose looks is actually covered into the down, a-dead child during the her breast
It missing our radios and tv sets to depart all of us rather than photographs, in place of men and women maudlin tunes one to lulled our prior to bed straight back when we nevertheless experienced for the trains from the seaside, on farm where Laura sent her whole milk churns into the lake meet up with the brand new prince into horseback, kissing the stamping steed for the throat like in Gwendolyns lawn, abandoned from what it titled love. They generated united states spend evening reading Barthes and you may Derrida until conditions arrived undone inside our hand and absolutely nothing had more worthiness than just what it have had but do not performed as if guarantees and the past had been you to definitely and also the same. All of our sight beheld just sadness. Our very own ears heard just strident, shrieked words. Not one person wanted to wake up us. They declined all of us the fresh new orchards, this new towns with bars and carriages, new peacefulness away from cemeteries, the hearses shining in the sun, heads more likely till the inactive and also at the fresh new hours of your own Angelus, the fresh enjoying plus the drunkenness of your grape attain, haylofts in which some one finally offered all of us its nude muscles in addition to disclosure generated you shout.
Brand new Sistine Chapel is full of graffiti, the new pope has been dragged through the avenue off Rome, flogged by the boys which the guy very enjoyed and caressed
Laura was still a virgin. Their students not even sobbing about garden. She greeted this new staff of the Thetis secured into Lake Ouse, she traversed new undulating character of your mountains out of Sussex, charm engrossed in the beauty, until in the Newhaven she located water mist, a hairy give looking towards the woman feet, breaking her versus the lady understanding the love she not any longer thought from inside the, nor create actually ever. Every woman expelled out-of Eden, doomed and you can abandoned, be prostitutes. Usually do not humiliate the newest humiliated, avoid wounding the fresh deceased, dont profane beauty. On the pc windowpanes i identify our very own shed label, he is our very own recollections, it go back going back to you. Our very own mommy, a whore who fled our house immediately following birthing myself. She didnt like my deal with, they wasnt telegenic, cannot market soap, happier certainly bubbles. She didnt should destroy the woman breasts. In the evening she emptied the lady dairy towards the bathroom and i is actually awoken from the food cravings in addition to bad odor off her erect nipples.
Nowadays I identify Laura, however, she died, crucified. Her virginity upset people. And you will through to the mix it unsealed the girl naked, covered in the bloodstream in which we love female really making us stop loving her or him. Up to it abandoned united states contained in this wasteland hence, out of afar, looked like an enthusiastic unreal city, the newest Heaven where i ought not to ever provides believed. Brand new unlock soil was filled up with new rotting cadavers away from angels and, when a wireless give unwrapped new doorways, i heard the songs that hears in the Paradise however, there is certainly no one, no way to go after, absolutely nothing to consider. I experienced to invent my personal prior, which facts We develop once you understand it isn’t certain since the certainty does not exists. We invent Laura and you may she flees. Condemned so you can creative imagination, cursed from the this lady, I skip when the avoid of https://datingranking.net/cs/senior-sizzle-recenze months will come, when dawns often emerge in this scary dark. I’m sure, due to the fact I have just accomplished inventing they, Laura is perhaps all girls, her pubic locks, their armpits, this lady straight back in which lizards repose, this lady blank stare where the sunshine rests. Whenever i come back to the country, will i keep this in mind facts? Will i remember the individual who are mom, brand new violated woman, the desired lady, the fresh new air regarding beauty hence now rejects me personally for all time? Brand new intimidating beginning from Genesis, its worst plants?